Live free yoga

Liberated living through the sadhana of yog; enlivened realisations by the grace of the Guru.

Category Archives: Mahavatar Babaji


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the inner essencetial Guru


A Recap

Over the years I notice that I have pondered much on the subject of the Guru/shishya, Master/disciple principle; though not premeditated I see in myself a fascination with this phenomenal bond in the spiritual arena. Of course this bond exists in normal teacher/student relationships too. Even those who are not actively on the path of spiritual discovery might see in themselves an influence by a teacher or professor, a mentor whose guidance has brought them to the present stage of life.

An example of my predisposition with this topic is the title of my book One Master one disciple which chronicles my journey in the Presence of my Guru, a journey that began with a mystical meeting in 1998; four years ago I wrote a blog on Gurus, shishyas and the Satguru and now here I am once again on a topic that is as intricate as it is mystical, fraught with strong opinions, understandings and misunderstandings bordering on the vacuous or intellectual. Yet, I am compelled to continue after my usual reiteration that the realisations here are mine alone and opposing views and realisations are equally valid- for those who have them, as these are for me. As noted earlier, my blogs are a way of light conversation, a time out from sadhana, in fact the topic is often the result of the sadhana- inner introspection.

The Principle Guru

I now realise that as my sadhana takes roots, my understanding of this Guru principle is deepening. It takes me towards a state of clarity unclouded by external factors or inner turmoil, I acknowledge this inner presence that reflects the outer presence of the Guru. This learning is for me, a great step towards true discipleship. Yogiraj in his book Babaji, the lightning Standing Still has included a chart with two headings, World Teacher and World King. In my humorous way I have always imagined a third column in this chart, that of ‘world disciples’ for those who would like to come in every lifetime to accompany these Teachers and Kings and are happy in that role and content to fill that column in every life! Ah a whimsical thought accompanied by a humble pranam ЁЯЩПЁЯП╜.

Very early on I had understood that one of the foremost accomplishment of the external Satguru is to turn the disciple inwards towards the inner guru. In fact, by their very nature Guru’s perform this act of revelation; stopping and reversing the flow of attention from the external to the inner Guru. Of course each disciple makes this journey at their own pace. This process of reversal and inner wisdom is a part of the yogic path, as layers of the koshas, from gross to subtle are purified through the given practice, the inner guide starts to shine forth. As the veil dissolves the disciple realises the externally present and their inner Guru to be of the same essence.

The Flux Motion

As the yogi practitioners apply themselves to the practice given by their Satguru, a process is put into motion similar to the process of the germination of a seed. As the disciple is saturated with the Satgurus grace the dormant and or latent seed of the Vivek Buddhi in the disciple awakens and begins to expresses itself. The practice and the presence of the living master works like the water and sun helping the disciple to realise their full potential. There are of course many permutations and combinations to this development, the fertility of the soil, the receptivity of the seed itself, the surrounding environment and climate of the society in which the disciple interacts. But I have realised that when the seed is ready to sprout the water and the sun- the Satguru will find them to start the process of awakening.

As the seed sprouts it not only germinates and moves up towards the sun but also puts down roots to harness nourishment from the soil. Ditto with the disciple encouraged and nourished by the grace and loving guidance of the master and the rooting into the practice of the given technique of inner understanding, the disciple expresses the spiritual radiance in all their actions, manifested and unmanifested. This is a great learning experience and many years and lifetimes may go in this process, as one lifetime may not be enough to accomplish the required level of inner wisdom to finally let go, the ego of it all.




The Veil of the Panchakoshas

Often I hear people referring to how they listen to their inner guide for all matters spiritual and that they don’t need an external Guru or a practice for guidance. But, according to me, it’s not an easy matter to be able to connect to this inner guide, or to be sure the guidance that is coming is not dictated by one’s own desires or wants.

The body is made up of 5 layers or koshas, the annamaya physical body of food, the pranamaya body of breath/pran, the manomaya the body of mind and emotion, the vignyanamaya body of intellect and the anandamaya body of intuition, each contributing to refraction of information received and executed, all influencing one another and the five senses that collect information. Beyond these is the soul, also covered with its samskars and past karmas. Within this multilayered shell is the hidden spark of the inner guru.

For the inner Guru to shine forth unhindered the external layers have to reach a state of clarity and stillness unhindered by turbulence. To accomplish this, many tools are used by those on this path- various pranayam techniques, mantra frequencies, chakra sadhana etc. For practicing yogis a natural adherence to the 8 limbs of yog sadhana. In some cases sitting in the Presence of a master aids in accomplishing this state, depending upon the stature of the Master and readiness of the disciple this can be speedy or slow. Only conscious effort brings the disciple to this stage of unperturbed equilibrium is my realisation.

The wonder is that as the outer Satguru’s grace and our own effort with the practice builds the bridge from out to in, the already present inner Guru expresses in to out completing the formation of the bridge. On a lighter note my mind conjures up the building of the Eurotunnel, where work began on both ends and the Chunnel then met perfectly in the middle. Of course no spiritual pun intended…about France and UK, about who is Master and who disciple, lets leave it to the football teams to decide that ЁЯШВ

The Final Turnabout

In the end we return to the seed that has sprouted and grown roots and shoots akin to the disciple fully nurtured with all the inner wisdom, expressing it in all facets of their lives. The final service the Satguru does is to now reverse the process to a withdrawal where the seed pulls back into itself its outer manifestations and the disciple moving inwards rests in the inner Nothingness, knowing that it is of the same essence as the essence of the external Satguru and Master. The disciple during practice may have already become aware of this similarity of essence, of the clear stream of consciousness that connects the innermost core of the Satguru with their own innermost core, devoid of all external paraphernalia. Nay the disciple may have already learnt to ‘listen’ internally to this essence of the Satguru, the true gnosis. But in the final retracing and resting in this state is the purpose of the yog sadhana accomplished.

This seems to be the primary function of the Satguru, to assist in forming the bridge that transports the disciple to the inner guru and rest in THAT.

For this great service a disciple can never repay the SatGuru.

Note* This germinating seed is just one of my analogies, there are and can be many as this whole process of the Guru/disciple phenomena is very fascinating and has as many permutations combinations as there are Gurus and shishyas. My realisation of the Outer & Inner Guru, however remains constant.


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Kriya Yoga~ speedy, scientific and practical? OR esoteric, secretive and mystical? Part 2

тАЬYogтАЭ, says Yogiraj Siddhanath my Satguru, тАЬis an inner ascent through evermore refined and evermore expanded spheres of mind to get to the godessence that is at the core of our own being.тАЭ

And Kriya Yog as discussed in an earlier blog is a lightning path that takes us to this godessence at our core- faster!

As always the points put forth are my own arrived at by realisations through practice and inner and outer study and learning, anyone is welcome to disagree and have other points of view. These blogs are an attempt at studying my own thoughts and are used as playful recreation, shared with those who may find them helpful.

In part 1 of this same topic we had discussed the beginning of Kriya Yoga as we know it today; its introduction to the modern world, around 1861 to be exact, by Lahiri Mahasaya; the Kriya Yoga lineage starting from Mahavatar Babaji to Lahiri Baba and branching out through his various disciples and their disciples to present day teachers; understanding why Yogiraj Siddhanath calls Mahavatar Babaji, Shiv Goraksha Babaji. Also briefly discussed was the process of entering the stream of this practice today.

In this part I would like to touch upon the actual practice itself, drawing upon what I have learnt and understood from my master, my own realisations from my practice and from sharing it with others over many years, from this and other lives past. And how while being a practical and scientific method of speedy recovery Kriya Yoga also unlocks an esoteric, secretive and mystical world to its dedicated sadhaks.

Kriya Yoga is a subtle pranayam technique practiced in the central Sushumna channel in the spine. Yogis and Rishis in ancient Bharat discovered early on the connection between the breath and the mind and how it can be used to holistically heal the human body of its ailments while taking the practitioner towards the yogic goal of Self realisation.

The Kriya Yoga practice- speedy, scientific, and practical

Though earlier the emphasis in science was physical and applied, science moved swiftly towards the empirical, once the influence of the mind on the body became apparent in studies of psychology. At first, the role of the breath was confined to oxygenation of body cells, but science today is fast discovering the importance of breath in treating many cardiological, respiratory and neurological diseases at a deeper level. The use of breath work in the psychiatric field, for hypertension, for children with ADHD syndrome and people suffering from PTSD amply reveals the connection between the mind and the breath in controlled environment of science. Yoga at the level of asanas/postures and pranayama/breathwork is a field of much scientific research today and is being accepted as means of post trauma healing and recovery from surgery and mental health issues. Even the mulabandha a technique of applying a yogic lock and an important part of Kriya Yoga is practiced under the name of Kegel exercises to improve the pelvic floor muscles. Meditation with medication is a new mantra now.

Kriya Yoga is universal, easy to learn, simple to practice and is available to all; it does not need any prerequisites. It can be practiced sitting on the floor or on a chair. There are no age restrictions, no restrictions on diet or require any kind of lifestyle change. The results of Kriya Yoga, if practiced with regularity are apparent very quickly. Each step in Kriya Yoga is conducive to a good physical, emotional and mental health.

In the primary practice of Kriya Yoga a rythm is established between the incoming and outgoing breath that in turn effects the brain waves and the agitated waves of stress and tension start to slow and the mind responds by calming. This systematic breathing is conducive to lowering blood pressure and hypertension. It gives a much needed rest to the organs in the body; the heart and the lungs along with the rest of the body are deeply oxygenated and decarbonised preventing premature decay of tissue.

The spine is used as the medium of transport for the inhaled and exhaled breath. The gentle friction of the regulated and concentrated breath calms the central nervous system, popularly called the command centre. Like the stroking of a parents hand on the back of a child, the practitioner is immediately relaxed and feels supported. A harmony is formed between the brain and the body, the benefits are too numerous to count. The central nervous system is a conduit between the brain, the cerebellum, the cerebrum and the nervous system that regulates the functioning of the whole body. The practice is conducive to stimulate and regulate the vagus nerve achieved by controlled breathing and holding of the breath. The Kriya breath, by its very nature, balances the left and right brain hemispheres.

Certain steps of Kriya Yoga work upon the various plexuses aligned along the spine. The plexus are a hub of intersecting nerves situated along the spine and simply put, communicate information from the body to the brain. A healthy non corrupted exchange of information is necessary for a healthy functioning of the organs and the various biological systems of the body, respiratory, digestive, lymphatic, excretory et al. A special mention is required here of the glandular or endocrine system, and though working on all the glands, the pituitary, pineal and the hypothalamus receive an immense amount of care and attention in the practice and are responsible for the overall feeling of quiet and joy that results from the practice of Kriya Yoga.

A quick look at the diagram below reveals the scope and expanse of the nervous system and its reach into every portion of the human body.



The physical stretches in the practice elongate the muscles and make room around the organs for better absorption of the oxygen for better health.

Quantum physics is another field that is studying the deep correlation between matter and energy and may one day be able to bring the mystical and the scientific together on the same board. At present Kriya Yoga does this in a wonderful way for the practitioner.

The Kriya Yoga Practice- esoteric, secretive and mystical

For me the scope of Kriya Yoga from scientific to esoteric is beautifully explained in this verse from the Shikshavalli (initiation of students into an education system in the Vedic times), the first chapter of the Taittreya Upanishad,

рдирдореЛ рдмреНрд░рд╣реНрдордгреЗ редрдирдорд╕реНрддреЗ рд╡рд╛рдпреЛ ред рддреНрд╡рдореЗрд╡ рдкреНрд░рддреНрдпрдХреНрд╖рдВ рдмреНрд░рд╣реНрдорд╛рд╕рд┐ редрддреНрд╡рдореЗрд╡ рдкреНрд░рддреНрдпрдХреНрд╖рдВ рдмреНрд░рд╣реНрдо рд╡рджрд┐рд╖реНрдпрд╛рдорд┐ редреарддрдВ рд╡рджрд┐рд╖реНрдпрд╛рдорд┐ редрд╕рддреНрдпрдВ рд╡рджрд┐рд╖реНрдпрд╛рдорд┐ ред
namo Brahmaney. namaste Vayo (vayu). tvameyva pratyaksham Brahmaasi.
tvameyva pratyaksham Brahma vadishyaami. Hritam vadishyaami. Satyam vadishyaami.


Here the student while bowing to Vayu, the diety of air, one of the panch bhutas (earth, water, fire, air and space) proclaims it to be the perceptible and tangible aspect of Brahman -the ultimate reality. The student continues to proclaim this as right and truthful. A simple verse repeated by rote by many but with a very deep understanding for practicing kriyabaans who understanding the connection use the tangible Kriya breath (the inhaled pran vayu and the exhaled apan vayu) to access and merge into the Brahman- the ultimate reality in the Kuthasta Chaitanya.

The fact that I cannot share the technique or completely reveal the practice here is the esoteric nature of this practice. Though meant for everyone there is a unique code of sharing between the teacher and the student. From the time of Lahiri Mahasaya a discipline has been established of sharing the actual technique in the environment of the Guru-Shishya Parampara. That is, the technique is taught in a sacred environment; a dakshina- fee, not necessarily monetary, as prescribed is charged; and the knowledge is passed on from the teacher to the student in a special and sacred manner with an oath of secrecy. The mystique of this technique is maintained even in the ancient texts that though obliquely referring to this practice does not ever reveal the whole method. Of course, now one can find all of it exposed on the internet and in books. Bur serious practitioners still prefer to receive it from a Guru and there is a reason for it.

After observing how science is in the process of discovering and adopting yogasanas and pranayam for benefit in the field of healing trauma, here is what I understand the rishis and yogis discovered through inner study and practice. The yogis went a few steps further and discovered that the breath is not only invested with oxygen but is infused with the even more subtler pran, called the life force energy by the western world today, that permeated every breath taken by a living being, whether human, animal or plant. In fact they realised that the whole universe was held together by this intelligent force of pran and by connecting with it a yogi could become part of this universal source! A giant leap from unified field theory to practice, methinks with amusement.

The Kriya practitioner goes beyond the perceptible breath and becomes aware of the 5 Pran or vayus in the body which are referred to as the pran, apaan, samaan, vayan and udaan; though inherently same, these descriptions are according to the function they perform and all of them are infused with the intelligence of the Pran the life breath. In Kriya Yoga also called the Kundalini pranayam, the tangible spine is let go of and the practing kriyabaan enters into the subtler central Sushumna Naadi and as the practice improves penetrates even further into the Vajra, Chitrini and Brahma naadis. These lead to heightened states of awareness and are subjective to individual practitioners, their level of concentration, grace of the Satguru and karmic load. In the advanced stages of practice the Kriya practitioner achieves the task of transmuting the body of flesh into a body of light.

The inhaled and exhaled breath become the subtle pran and apan. The kumbhaks, antari and bahiri and the three bandhs combined with purak and rechak are used in prescribed ratio to bring all the 5 pran to flow seamlessly towards the divine indweller.

Interpenetrating the plexus in the physical body are the subtle chakras in which the Kriya yogi experiences the deeper truths of existence, personal and cosmic. The practice dissolves past karmas while emboldening the practitioner to face present karmas, with grace. Remember karma here refers to both, those perceived as positive or negative.

Called the lightning path by Yogiraj Siddhanath and the aeroplane path by Yogananada, the practice of Kriya Yoga expedites ones journey towards the inner guru exponentially. In the esoteric practice of the Kriya Yoga as the student immerses in the inner cosmic body they realise the microcosmic body as the reflection of the macrocosmic universe.

Since none of these realisations can be computed by science, are individual in nature and are extremely hard to share or explain they remain in the realm of esoteric and mysterious.

The Role of the Satguru- enlivening the pran

A compassionate and healing Light
A Hamsa in its splendid flight
Away oh darkness! Fly oh night
The yogi comes in radiant might.
– Yogiraj Siddhanath

In the Indian context a lot of importance is given to the role of the Satguru in ones spiritual unfoldment. A living guru seen as a necessary ingredient in the shishyas inner journey towards the realisation of the Self. This is not because one cannot achieve significant progress on ones own but because at certain points in the journey a special wisdom or information needs to be imparted according to each individual seeker, a key so to say to unlock a door to further progress. One size here does not fit all. Though many seekers are happy to progress at their own pace reading and following innumerable techniques given in many of our texts and treatises; learning from many and adapting the techniques to their own liking, the training done under one true guru overrides lifetimes of wandering, is my understanding.

In the Kriya Yoga lineage, the living Satguru transforms and enlivens the pran in the disciples spinal channel giving a boost to the disciples progress along the path. Simply put, the pran is enlivened to become capable of penetrating the kuthasta and taking the seeker to the highest of samadhi. This pran is referred to as the marut pran. For this service the disciple is forever beholden to the guru with whom they often travel from lifetime to lifetime until final salvation.




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Of Gurus, shishyas and the Satguru

Let’s begin with this beautiful track of a Kabir song about the Satya guru sung soulfully by one of my favourite singers Channulal Mishra from Kashi. The song expresses much of what I learnt from my own Satguru, who among other qualities awakened in me an awareness of divinity in the daily activities of ordinary life and ignited a joy within not dependent on external circumstances. The song begins with a couplet awaring us of a false guru and goes on to explain the role of the Satguru. You can let the song play as you read the rest of this post ЁЯЩВ

That guru is called True (music track)

When I first started this article it was going to be only about the Satguru and the Guru but I then realised that without the shishya who gazes upon them this would be an incomplete effort. So here I am eschewing upon a most difficult topic and wondering why I am even attempting this since I will probably open myself to more flak than appreciation. But when has that ever stopped me from saying what I feel. And as usual I write from my own experiences and inference and anyone is welcome to disagree.

For the purpose of this article I am going to use the word Satguru for true spiritual guru and guru for a teacher or acharya and shishya for student or disciple and seeker. I am purposely not using the word follower here as for me this implies a ‘blind’ faith in the person or path being tread, a pack mentality- sheeple as they are addressed now, lacking what is called, the vivek buddhi or power of discernment.

SATGURU

The coming of the Satguru in a discipleтАЩs life is akin to the meteorite falling on earth that ended the age of the dinosaurs giving the Earth an evolutionary boost. The arrival brings to an end the dinosaurian mindset in the disciple ushering a new beginning. Dinosaurian here refers not only to a conditioned and atrophied mindset but also to the intellectual knowledge collected over years of study. Shams crashed into Rumi’s life reducing all his bookish knowledge to naught. The vibration of the Satguru is such that it transforms the disciple, sometimes at first meeting. There are many such examples, Yukteswar Giri and Yogananada, Ramakrishna and Vivekananda*.

English language has no appropriate word for Satguru. Popularly the word Master is used in its stead, but the word ‘master’ in all its nuances does not come close to explaining Satguru as understood in the spiritual context. Though I have used the word master, for want of a better word in English, for the title of my book One Master one disciple, it does not inspire me. For me the word master immediately brings to mind an autocratic figure wielding control over his slave disciples, which a true spiritual guru definitely does not do.

In earlier times it was common to address spiritual satgurus with the simpler guru. It indicated a person exhibiting the attributes of a Satguru even though not addressed as one, for example Guru Gorakhnath who is at the level of a deity! And Sikh guru’s, Nanak to Gobind, though referred to as Guru many of them exhibited the characteristics of the Satguru, i.e. the ability to transform by their mere presence the disciple, one of the principal quality of the Satguru who does not ‘do’ anything but by merely ‘being’ sparks in the seeker an inner light of divinity. Some of the great gurus did not even use a prefix or a suffix such as Kabir, Lalla, Lahiri, yet they were recognised by the then present as shining in the light of the divine.

One key quality to note in a Satguru is that their goal is the expansion of the awareness of the disciple, to disengage them from the external and move them inwards. A true spiritual guru is not an advisor for daily living…getting a job, having a good relationship, making money, doing well in class etc.

The paradoxes on the spiritual path become suddenly clear to the disciple after contact with the Satguru, arousing a knowingness of the universe by connecting with its blueprint within. The paradox that going with the flow gives control of one’s life, the disciple who drowns in the ocean of divinity is the one who actually gets to the other side rather than the one swimming on the surface. Jo ubhra so doob gaya jo dooba so paar!!

The Satguru awakens the disciple to the inner wellspring of joy enabling the disciple to become love and radiate love. All this the Satguru can do by mere presence. A technique or practice may be given to relax the grip of  the disciples mind and the transformation is initiated.

The external physical Satguru introduces the disciple to the inner essential Satguru. A true spiritual Guru does not become the disciples crutch rather the Satguru guides the disciple to become self reliant. Physical proximity, after a while can reduce as the Satguru can, at will, contact the disciple who is receptive thousands of miles away. I have had this experience, as I am sure, have others.

*(Interestingly, most popular examples i could find or give from the past are of male gurus and their male disciples. Is it patriarchy that effaced the names of the women saints or were they themselves not interested in leaving behind a hierarchy. Not saying there were none, there are many examples of women Rishis but Meera, Lalla, many female ascetics from South India established no organised sect or religions, seemingly satisfied with their own connection to divinity and radiating it.  There are scant mention of their key disciples. Similarly most pictures I found were also rendition of male gurus with male disciples. This trend has changed in recent times since the likes of Anandamoyee Ma. Hmn, this would be a topic of another more in-depth study…or not. )

GURU

Today the word Guru is often used more loosely to mean an expert in any particular field. So  we have the management gurus, IT and tech gurus and even the love guru. They are well read and have “mastered” their subjects. The word guru in the present context for me means a teacher who throws light on the subject under study. In India anyone who teaches us anything, be it music, dance or sports is accorded the status of a guru, starting from our parents who are considered the first guru.

While the satguru is associated only with the spiritual field the guru or teacher can be from any field. But here we are turning the lens on gurus of the spiritual path so will focus on them.

The Satguru, by nature, lets the pure light of the Divine flow through without corruption and transforms the disciple; the Guru, on the other hand, teaches, fine tunes and perfects the technique given for practice by the Satguru to the disciple. The more clarity the Guru has in passing on the teachings sincerely, the more the benefit to the student. Depending on the lineage, the Guru guides the student in mantra or tantra, in yog or its specialised branches. The teacher inspires the student by living and naturally exhibiting the qualities that are the result of the practice, love courage, joy and peace, siddhis if that’s what’s being taught. In short by example and walking the path the teacher shows the way to the student.

Since the Guru is also evolving he/she is vulnerable to the pitfalls of human passions and emotions and can be easily influenced by Ego and Ahamkar. Most gurus fall prey to the adulations of their students, some of whom can and do praise sincerely or sycophantically. Greed for money and fame being another of the hazard the teacher watches out for. Therefore the Guru needs to be constantly in connect with the light of the Satguru. In the path of yoga, be in sync with the yama and niyamas. The swadhyaya -self study, turning the lens inwards, being a very important tenet for teachers on the spiritual path of guiding seekers, keeps the teacher realistic and away from delusions of being a satguru or profess taking on the role of the satguru.

SHISHYA

Now wherein in all this does the shishya or pupil fit in?

In the clear gaze of the shishya the image of the Satguru and the Guru is reflected back giving them an unadulterated view of themselves. The Satguru shines in the sky like the sun radiating life, neither needing nor wanting, but the moment the shishya’s gaze turns upwards an enriching connection is formed, a connection of Love, in that exchange of love, the disciple flowers and the Satguru accomplishes the evolution of another soul.

In the case of the teacher, whats a teacher without the taught. Though the guru may be releasing a fragrance of knowledge and information like a flowering tree but its the sincere student who is drawn to partake of it, completing and complementing the role of that teacher to distribute knowledge.

The shishya, according to me, has the most difficult of roles in this trio – to recognise a satguru from a guru, a charlatan guru from a sincere one. Especially as both the Satguru and the Guru can physically appear the same. In fact the Guru often being still in the ego looks and behaves more pious than the Satguru who is more natural and whose aim is to shake and wake up the disciple. Contrarily a Guru might take on a role like a Satguru might, a zen master, being rude and harsh. Now the shishya has to sift this through the lens of his/her own discretion and recognise the sincere teacher and distinguish him or her from a Satguru!

 A very difficult task indeed sometimes learnt after trial and error by the seeker, over many lives! One cannot base this identification on the number of disciples an existing Satguru has or the popularity of an organisation, here the seeker might just end up being a “follower”, similarly discovering an ascetic hidden in a cave in the Himalayas also does not guarantee a genuine satguru. The seeker to ‘see’ the Satguru needs an unbiased clear sight uncorrupted by conditioning.

Well I wish good luck to all such seekers.

Doodled some early morning musings that i found interesting and you might too.

IMG_7455

Explaining the doodle, at the bottom we have the pool of creation that includes everything that is created- the whole universe. Here we focus on the pool of humanity from which come the seekers of many hues. Those that seek actively for a spiritual true living Guru or just a teacher of philosophies, yoga, spiritual techniques. Seekers who are entrenched in religions of their choice, following customs, traditions, religious functions. Seekers not seeking anything, happy or not in the trammels of daily life and seekers seeking material and external happiness. From this pool come the disciples and students.

Some find a teacher who leads them to a Satguru, others find the Satguru directly or vice versa the Satguru finds them. Some Satguru’s connect with a deity- Shiva and his rays Gorakh, Hanuman; Vishnu and his avatars, Ram, Krishna, Buddha; Shakti, the Mahavidyas, Kaali, Durga. These beings, for me being extra terrestrial and cosmic beings  are in human form only because they are appearing on earth, on another galaxy they will appear like the locals! Some Seekers and Satguru’s might directly connect with the Infinite Ocean of consciousness, but usually even the most advanced and avataric beings have a physical guru/satguru and or diety, the reason for this I still have to figure out.

The infinite Ocean of consciousness is called by my Satguru Yogiraj Siddhanath as the Isness of the zero, not-zero who’s centre is everywhere and circumference nowhere. His poetry says it all:

рд╡рд╣рд╛рдВ рдзреНрдпрд╛рди рди рд╕реНрдерд╛рди рди рдирд╛рдж рди рдмрд┐рдВрдж, рдЖрдХрд╛рд╢ рдирд╣реАрдВ рд╡рд╣рд╛рдВ рдХрд╛рд▓ рдХрд╣рд╛рдБ
рд╕рдм рд╢реВрдиреНрдп рдЕрд╢реВрдиреНрдп рдХрд╛ рд╣реИрдкрди рд╣реИ, рдИрд╢реНрд╡рд░ рднреА рдирд┐рд░рдВрдХрд╛рд░ рд╡рд╣рд╛рдВ – рдпреЛрдЧрд┐рд░рд╛рдЬ рд╕рд┐рджреНрдзрдирд╛рде

Between these two pools all drama is being played. And the wonder of this infinite consciousness being within us and discoverable is exquisite. The Satguru leads us back here effortlessly supporting us.


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Kashi- Flowing us back to our source.

It’s amazing isn’t it when a certain truth is revealed to you at an unguarded moment and your awareness has an Aha moment and the brain lights up with a brilliance. Such revealed knowledge occurs as a result of the grace of our Satguru and our personal sadhana┬аand has the potential to transform us but might have little significance for someone else. This happened to me on a recent visit to Kashi.

Yes took off for a long time, but thats the beauty of a blog, no deadlines and no compulsions ha ha. Anyways here I am back from Kashi with what I’m hoping is another small step towards divinity….or not huh.

It was a peaceful time to visit this city.

Being the monsoon season the Ganga flowed majestically full, pregnant with water; her movement evoked in me a nostalgia of many lifetimes spent in her arms on the ghats of Kashi. A familiarity with her ebb and flow which could not have come from this life. The city streets┬аfelt the same, intimate knowledge akin to the free pariah dog who has marked territory and knows every secret of the winding gallis. On each visit to Varanasi as this city is now known, I have experienced this homecoming. The last visit was with my beloved Satguru Yogiraj Siddhanath and his wife Gurumata Shivangini.

The Urdhavaret Ganga.

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On the second day of my visit as I sat in a state of heightened happiness in my room overlooking the Ganga, I felt as if I too was in flow as she flowed towards the north,┬аNorth? and the realisation fell like a lightning bolt that,┬аthis┬аis the message of the Ganga from aeons of time- Go back to your source. She who is perceived to have emanated from Shiva’s locks in the Himalayas was here flowing back to her source! This has been her hidden message to the millions who took a dip in her year after year for thousands of years. Practice as I did Mahavatar Babaji’s urdhavaret breath of the Kundalini Kriya Yoga as taught by my Satguru Yogiraj Siddhanath, this realisation spurred on a movement of uncontrollable delight in my spine. At the same moment emanated within me, a sense of awe at this special revelation.

In her journey from the Himalayas in the north towards the Bay of Bengal to the south and east, the Ganga in Kashi turns back and flows North. Of course there must be a geophysical ‘reason’ for this but that is not of the essence here. What happened was a sudden inflow of divine insight for me. I had not read or heard about this phenomenon in any scriptures or ancient text, I don’t remember anyone ever mentioning the river in this spiritual context. ┬аYes, it was as if Ma Ganga revealed to me a secret which was forever visible through the ages but not realised. I wonder if I am the first person to chronicle this understanding of the┬аurdhavaret message of this ancient river.

After this realisation the daily morning dip took on a new meaning.┬а“Do not depend on externals for your happiness,” says Yogiraj urging his disciples to tap into their inner well of joy independent of material possessions or external supports. The Ganga was reiterating this as she flowed accepting the garbage and the flowers of love, the ashes and the sweet offerings, the greedy and the sincere devotees.

Sitting in the river I could feel all my energy reversing, a fountain of love, aided by the flow of the loving Ganga. We are truly liberated when we are able to unhook ourselves from the externals, she was indicating to me.┬аA profound sense of peace and contentment filled me and continues to fulfil me.

Visit to my Satguru and his Param Guru Sthan

There was a special reason for my trip at this time, a visit to Lahiri Mahasaya’s home which was open to public only on GuruPurnima day. On my earlier visits I have visited this house, almost difficult to find, and sat and stared at the door of an all too familiar house. The first time was on September 26th, 2011, at the time of the spontaneous visit I was unaware that it was Lahiri Mahasaya’s samadhi date in 1895. I had from many years ago had visions of Lahiri Baba and remembered a past spent with him in his presence, a close connection where I handed him his umbrella and his shoes when he ventured out, glass of water when he returned from work and how he blessed me as a young girl in my Bangla marriage attire.

┬а ┬аIMG_0094┬аCircumstances had made it impossible to realise this heartfelt desire earlier but this year being free from many responsibilities I undertook this pilgrimage.

On Gurupurnima day, early in the morning accompanied by two others I set off on a journey which for me was a completion of a karma from the past.

But first we visited the Nandi Ghat or Gaai Ghat, hallowed as it was by its association to our Satguru Yogiraj Siddhanath who spent his childhood days in this ghat owned by his family. Disciples rooted in the Guru/Shishya tradition always pay first respect to their living guru. There is a well known couplet by Kabir who says, ”┬ардЧреБрд░реБ рдЧреЛрдмрд┐рдиреНрдж рджреЛрдЙ рдЦрдбреЗ рдХрд╛рдХреЗ рд▓рд╛рдЧреВрдБ рдкрд╛рдБрдп,┬ардмрд▓рд┐рд╣рд╛рд░реА рдЧреБрд░реБ рдЖрдкрдиреЗ рдЧреЛрдмрд┐рдиреНрдж рджрд┐рдпреЛ рдмрддрд╛рдп,” meaning-” when the Guru and Gobind are both present whose feet should I touch first? beloved is the Guru who has shown me the way to God.” The Guru who has enlivened the spark within to even comprehend Gobind (a name for Krishna) will always take precedence in the heart of a true disciple. But for me my Guru is Gobind and I look no further. ЁЯША

Nandi Ghat/Gaai Ghat and Yogiraj’s family Temple.

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After a special aarati and sadhana at this very personal shiva temple we headed towards Lahiri Mahasaya’s home near Purana Durgaji in Chowsatti Ghat. Since the boats were banned due to the fast flowing river we made our way through the narrow familiar streets of the old city. No photographs were allowed inside so I managed to take some from the narrow street outside.

Lahiri Mahasaya’s Home as seen from the street.

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Soon as I entered the house I was pleasantly surprised at the layout, which was exactly as I remembered it, the stairs coming down, the open space in the centre, this confirmation of my remembrance was very comforting as I realised it was not just an imagination of the closeness. As I bowed in front of the seat of Lahiri Baba I had a meltdown moment as past life associations came flooding out. At the same time there was a sense of a completion and I knew I did not have to come back here again. Interestingly, when my forehead touched the asan of Lahiri Baba it stuck there for an instant and I realised that some wet red paint had adhered to my forehead from my gurus temple which had been freshly painted and this now had been transferred to the seat of Lahiri Mahasaya, a smudge of red on the blanket! In small signs great connections are revealed! We received the prasad from the family members and left.

Street Food, Bovine Majestica etc.

Daily breakfast was at the corner kachori shop which would open at 8:30 and shut at 10 am. The father and son duo seemingly happy with what they make in that time. The whole day was peppered with stops at The Blue Lassi shop with wifi for a mango lassi, the Kashi Chat Bhandar on Dasashwamedha Ghat for an amazing tamatar (tomato) chat or tikki and kulfi!! Of course our progress was often marred by majestic cows and bulls on the street who had to be cajoled out of the way. ЁЯША

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On the last evening we made it for the Ganga Aarati at Dasashwamedha Ghat.

IMG_0147Ganga AArati

It is right that I end this with the Manikarnika Ghat or the burning ghat. From the balcony of my room I could see the constant burning pyres, a testimony to the fleeting moment of human life. This too evoked a nostalgia and yearning for I know not what.

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